Last month Wake Forest University President Dr. Nathan O. Hatch announced his intention to retire at the end of the academic year on June 30, 2021.
With the Deacs being on a bye week, and to provide some humor and a much-needed break from the national presidential race, I thought it would be fun to put together a list of NOT serious candidates to replace Dr. Hatch. I asked you, the readers, on Twitter to nominate candidates for the position.
Without further ado, here is the list:
The Demon Deacon
The Demon Deacon has to be the #1 candidate on this list. His love and passion for the school is unrivaled by literally anyone else, as he attends every single sporting event and many other events around campus. You can't go a day without seeing him, and he’s literally the heart and sole of the campus. If you asked anyone around the country what the #1 thing they associate with Wake Forest University is, probably at least 75% of the answers would be the Demon Deacon. The only issue is that he doesn't actually speak, he just uses a lot of hand gestures. But hey, commencement and other events would be much shorter without a long speech from the president, and that’s definitely not a bad thing!
Ya Boy Stan Cotten
I’ll just pull an all nighter at ZSR...it’ll be fine https://t.co/lbyUQYuOAO— Ya Boy Stan Cotten (@NotStanCotten) November 5, 2020
Known for his humor in impersonating the Voice of the Deacs, Stan Cotten, and a must follow on Twitter, Ya Boy was a popular suggestion and if this was a vote he certainly has a lot of fans who would throw their support behind him. Though it might get confusing when the real Stan Cotten tries to interview the new president on the radio.
A popular preferred walk-on on the Wake Forest basketball team, and another great follow on Twitter, Miles Lester would also have a lot of support from fans. And if this were a voting matter, he would run away with the student vote based on his platform!
Zick’s and Subway will be free after midnight, Wednesday through Sunday!— Miles Lester (@mileslester23) November 5, 2020
Hard to argue with that platform. I’m sure Coach Forbes could figure out a way to allow Miles to fulfill his duties as president while still practicing with the team and participating in all basketball activities.
A former football player and graduate student, Brent has plenty of familiarity with the school. He appears to have accepted the nomination and perhaps hints at a Michael Scott-esque approach to the position. Quite frankly I’d be more than okay with that.
Another former football player, Bartee was nominated by BSD staff writer Cam Debro. While he has not released a platform, he certainly knows the campus and is passionate about the Deacs and the university.
Update: We can definitely get behind this! Everyone needs more Putters!
A BSD favorite and one of the most-beloved walk-ons in Wake Forest basketball history, this list wouldn't be complete without including Bobby. His passion on the bench is unrivaled by any player I’ve seen since, and his love for the school is evident. Though he hasn't officially released a platform I’m sure it’s all based around the #52—his number at Wake and clearly still his favorite number. He wouldn't be the 52nd president in school history, but I know he’d find ways to make 52 prominent all over campus.
Bless you— B-Ho (@bho52) November 5, 2020
Update: Hoekstra has released his platform:
And with that, it’s campaign time. Here are my platforms:— B-Ho (@bho52) November 6, 2020
1. Retire #52 (Brotherhood) for all sports
2. No more parking tickets
3. Less puddles on campus
5. Success https://t.co/Nw8lWfvIPK
The #WhyNotJohn campaign has started up again, though this time not for Heisman or for the Rams putting him in at QB, but for position of Wake Forest President. Wolford is certainly a popular choice, but I think he probably wants a chance to play a few years in the NFL first. But if for some reason the NFL doesn't work out, perhaps he can come run the university just like he ran the football program through one of the most successful runs in school history. Watch out for your girlfriends though.
North Carolina’s longtime Commissioner of Labor is finally retiring. If you’ve ever ridden in an elevator in the state of North Carolina you have seen Berry’s name and face. Perhaps she’d like to be president of a major university as her next job. And hey, if any of the elevators on campus ever had a problem we could pretty much immediately have them fixed!
Another very popular choice with lots of supporters, Naz-T Deac has been a favorite of Deacon fans for years. Known for his dancing and tie-dye shirt with custom jersey, Naz-T was a fixture of Wake Forest basketball during the Skip Prosser and Dino Gaudio eras. While he hasn't danced in years, fans still fondly remember his crazy dance moves to House of Pain’s Jump Around.
If this was an election and Naz-T ran on the platform of adding Jump Around as another official school song behind the fight song and alma mater and brought back the dances, he just might have a chance at winning.
Wake Forest fans still have high regard for Skinner after he led the Deacs to the 2006 ACC Championship as a redshirt freshman, and proceeded to lead the team through one of the most successful stretches in school history. As one of the greatest athletes in school history, Riley would be another popular choice that would likely garner a fair amount of votes if this were an actual election.
An all-time favorite for many due to his size, Bogues is a lovable Deac who embodies the spirit of persevering and never giving up. He has some executive experience as the head coach of the former Charlotte Sting of the WNBA, and has the right personality for the job. Who wouldn't love to see little 5-3 Muggsy stand up at the podium to deliver his commencement speech every year?
Yes I’m well aware that Timmy has a job currently as an assistant coach under Gregg Popovich with the San Antonio Spurs. But I can't make a list of potential candidates for president of the university without including the greatest living Demon Deacon of all-time. He wouldn't want the publicity, but honestly does the president really have to give a speech at commencement and appear at a bunch of public events? Besides, he could serve as an interim for a few years until the next guy on the list is ready to retire from his current job and take over.
Talk about a guy who already has leadership experience. Paul has been the president of the NBA Players’ Association since August of 2013, and has led the NBA through some of the toughest issues it has ever faced over the last few months. I don’t see any reason why he couldn't come back to his alma mater and take over as president when he’s ready. Though for now he’s still a darn good basketball player and one of the best point guards in the world, so until he’s ready to hang it up we’ll let him continue playing basketball.
Perhaps one of the greatest Wake Forest golfers of all-time, Woods probably won’t be done playing golf for a while, but what’s to say that she couldn't do both? She knows about winning in the ACC, and also has national name recognition.
Dearica is possibly the greatest women’s basketball player ever at Wake Forest, finishing her career as the program’s all-time leading scorer and rebounder. She’s also the WNBA’s two-time reigning Sixth Woman of the Year. Hamby probably wants to continue her basketball career for a while longer, but when she decides to stop playing, she would certainly be a top-tier candidate for the position of Wake’s president.
The current Wake Forest women’s basketball coach, and one of the greatest ever to don the old gold and black, Hoover hopefully won’t be leaving the sidelines anytime soon. But if she does decide to, her love for Wake Forest and presence all over the record books position her as a great candidate for president of the university.
Kupcho is the only candidate on this list with an individual National Championship, so she immediately separates herself from most of the rest of the field. Another athlete who is still in the prime of her career, Kupcho may not be the candidate right now as she likely wants to continue her golf career for a while, but should be high on this list the next time the position comes open.
A three-time national championship coach, Averill has had the most success at the collegiate level of anyone on this list. Now in her 29th year at Wake, she has become a fixture of the university. She probably wants to continue coaching, and we hope she does for a long time. But from a specifically Wake Forest standpoint, it will be hard to find someone with more experience and knowledge of the campus. When she is ready to retire from coaching, Averill would be an outstanding candidate for university president.
Mzeztee (Barbara Trautwein)
Adding my own personal touch to this list, it can't be complete without adding Wake Forest legend Mzeztee. While she is mostly retired at this point and probably wouldn't want to be president, I can't think of anyone more qualified than Mzeztee. She has been affiliated with Wake longer than anyone else on the list. Mzeztee started the Wake Forest women’s basketball pep band, and has been involved in some way with the band program ever since her arrival. She added the popular tune and one of my personal favorites “Demon Deacon Joy” to the band’s repertoire. She’s like everyone’s grandma, and certainly makes the campus a better place to be just by her presence. If I had to make anyone on this list my #1 candidate, it would be Mzeztee.
What do you all think of this list? Who would you have added to it? Comment below.